Indiana’s Sexual-Assault Debate Needs to Start Before the Assault

Cindy Ledbetter, Indiana House Representative, lives in Newburgh, Indiana. Ledbetter earned an associate degree from Ivy Tech Community College, a B.S. in nursing from the University of Southern Indiana, and M.S. in nursing from the University of Southern Indiana in 2013. Her career experience includes working as a psychiatric nurse practitioner, director of nursing, a supervisor in home health long term care, a retail manager, and owning a business. She has been a member of the American Psychiatric Nurses Association, the Coalition of Advanced Practice Nurses, the American Legion Auxiliary Unit 44, Deaconess Women's Hospital Perinatal Ethics Committee, and the SWIRCA

INDIANAPOLIS — Rep. Cindy Ledbetter recently put an uncomfortable but important question before Indiana lawmakers: Why does so much of our discussion about sexual assault begin after somebody has already been assaulted?

“We’re being reactive, not proactive,” Ledbetter told the Public Health, Behavioral Health, and Human Services Interim Study Committee, according to accounts of her remarks.

Ledbetter pointed to increasing sexual-assault cases reported by medical centers between 2019 and 2023 and described young women going to nightclub bathrooms in pairs because they fear being violated. She questioned whether pornography is helping create unrealistic expectations involving sex, consent and women's responses, and argued that young men need to understand something generations before them were also supposed to learn: A woman saying no is not an insult, a negotiation or an invitation to become angry. It means no.

That is an important conversation.

But the Hoosier Enquirer believes Indiana should make it an even bigger one.

Something Has Changed Between Men and Women

Nobody at HE wants to blame a victim of sexual assault. A woman's clothing, sexual history, contraception, drinking, religion—or lack of religion—never gives somebody permission to assault her. Consent remains consent.

But saying that shouldn't prevent Americans from asking what has happened to the broader culture surrounding sex, dating, marriage and relationships.

Marriage is happening dramatically later. The Census Bureau reports that in 2025 the estimated median age at first marriage reached 30.8 for men and 28.4 for women. In 1975, those numbers were 23.5 and 21.1. Meanwhile, the percentage of families living with their own children under 18 dropped from 54% in 1975 to 39% in 2025.

America is also producing fewer children. CDC provisional figures show 3.606 million births in 2025, down 1% from 2024, while the general fertility rate declined to 53.1 births per 1,000 women ages 15–44.

Something substantial has happened to courtship and family formation.

The Smartphone Replaced the Front Porch

Previous generations certainly had casual sex, adultery, bad dates and sexual violence. Nostalgia shouldn't become historical amnesia.

What they didn't have was a device in every pocket offering Tinder, Instagram, TikTok, Snapchat, pornography and an essentially unlimited stream of prospective partners and sexualized imagery.

Young people can now evaluate one another through photographs, followers, income, appearance and lifestyle before ever having a conversation. Some influencers monetize intimacy itself. Dating can begin to resemble shopping, while relationships can become transactions.

And the frustration isn't confined to one sex.

Survey research has found young single men substantially more interested in dating than young single women. One national survey found 52% of young single men were open to dating compared with 36% of young single women. Pew has separately found that younger men are especially likely to be single.

That doesn't prove women are doing anything wrong. Women are free to reject any man for any reason. Men are equally free to decide a relationship isn't right for them.

It does suggest that the sexes may increasingly be looking for different things—and increasingly failing to find one another.

Pornography Deserves a Serious Discussion

Ledbetter's concern about pornography should not be laughed away, but neither should Indiana legislators exaggerate what science has established. Women create it, or at least allow themselves to be whores on camera.

A systematic review of 23 studies examining pornography found that extreme violence and rape were comparatively uncommon in the material studied, but less extreme aggression, domination and unequal sexual relationships appeared considerably more frequently. When dominating or violent behavior appeared, researchers found it was overwhelmingly directed toward women.

But correlation is not causation. Another systematic review specifically examining pornography and consent concluded that research has not established a consensus about whether pornography produces better or worse understanding of consent, and cautioned researchers against turning correlations into causal claims. A 2024 review likewise found conflicting results concerning pornography and sexual coercion and said causality remains unclear.

That nuance actually strengthens Ledbetter's larger question.

A teenager shouldn't have to learn about relationships from pornography any more than he should learn to drive by watching The Fast and the Furious.

Parents, schools, churches, coaches and communities have responsibilities here. People need to go the church again. Young women and men find a church. Read a bible. Stop being self-destructive and ignorant.

And Stop Pretending Men Cannot Be Victims

This is one area where the public discussion desperately needs updating.

Sexual violence disproportionately affects women, but men are victims too.

CDC reports that nearly one in four American men has experienced some form of contact sexual violence during his lifetime. About one in 14 has been made to penetrate somebody else without consent, according to one CDC presentation of the data. The agency has also found that perpetrators of sexual coercion and “made to penetrate” offenses against male victims were predominantly women.

More recent CDC figures similarly show substantial male victimization and emphasize that sexual violence against both sexes is underreported.

Those men deserve exactly the same fundamental message as female victims:

You did not consent. What happened matters.

A serious prevention policy therefore cannot begin with the assumption that every potential perpetrator is male and every potential victim female.

Where Did Marriage, Faith and Responsibility Go?

Religion cannot prevent rape, and religious people commit terrible crimes too. But it is legitimate for conservatives to ask whether removing marriage, religious teaching, family expectations and personal restraint from discussions of sexuality has produced consequences.

Pew's latest Religious Landscape Study found Christians ages 40–59 reported an average 2.2 biological children, compared with 1.8 among religiously unaffiliated adults in that age group. That doesn't establish religion as the cause, but it does demonstrate a measurable relationship between religious affiliation and family formation.

Young Americans are also much less religious than their grandparents' generation. Pew found only 30% of adults born from 1995 through 2002 reported praying daily, and 26% said they attended religious services at least monthly.

At the same time, America has normalized pornography, casual hookups, increasingly explicit social media, contraception and abortion while delaying marriage and producing fewer children.

Conservatives are entitled to ask whether those changes are entirely unrelated.

They are not entitled to declare without evidence that a woman was assaulted because she participated in them.

That distinction matters.

Prevention Means Expectations for Everybody

Perhaps Indiana's prevention conversation should become surprisingly old-fashioned.

Teach boys that masculinity includes self-control. Teach them that rejection is part of life and that nobody owes them sex.

Teach girls that self-respect shouldn't be measured in Instagram likes, expensive gifts or the attention of strangers online.

Teach both that intoxication creates dangerous situations, that consent matters, that manipulating another person for sex, money or status is destructive, and that pornography isn't an instruction manual for human intimacy.

Teach young women that men have feelings and dignity.

Teach young men that women have autonomy and dignity.

And teach everybody that a human being is not a swipe, follower, hookup, meal ticket, sugar daddy, OnlyFans customer or sexual conquest.

That isn't victim blaming.

It is culture building. And the Indiana Court system is in the dark ages, under Loretta Rush a failed DEI RINO Chief Justice. Criminal justice reform is needed as much as Rush's resignation, which is long overdue.

Rep. Cindy Ledbetter is right to ask why government spends so much time discussing what happens after sexual violence. Indiana absolutely needs hospitals, counselors, police, prosecutors and victim services.

But if prevention is the objective, lawmakers cannot be afraid to discuss what happens before the crime.

The difficult conversation isn't merely about rape.

It is about what young men and women have been taught about one another, what pornography and social media are teaching in the absence of parents and institutions, why marriage keeps getting pushed later, why fewer children are being born, why loneliness and dating frustration persist, and whether a culture celebrating virtually unlimited sexual freedom has devoted nearly enough attention to responsibility.

Indiana can protect victims without declaring future war on men.

Conservative men defend marriage, faith, family and sexual restraint without pretending every social problem has one simple cause, but women don't want them or their conservative believes, choosing bad boys and cash.

Maybe being proactive begins there.